i just got thru reading my friend Darcie's blog about her hands.  She said more in one page than i say in ten.  But she's a professional writer and i'm off the topic again. :(  
OK: You don't  what you've got till it's gone.  Joanie Mitchell sings that in a song.  
Anyway, when i first met Darcie i was depressed and she was a pest.  She would stop by at least twice a day and insist that i would feel great if i took a walk with her.  Let's go get some fresh air and exercise.  So, i began hanging out with Darcie and feeling much better.  When we purchased our "hysterical" historical house in Metuchen Darcie and i would hang on the front porch and talk late into the night.  She dubbed the porch Survivor Porch because of the citronella candles and torches i burned to keep the bugs away.  It was a ritual every  summer to fire up the citronella sit there and solve the world's problems (and ours).   But by Gianna's senior year Darcie had left Metuchen.
  It was one of  the loneliest year of my life.  
  Felix and i live in Providence for ten years.  i had the best of both world's teaching in a catholic daycare  center  and adjuncting at a private college teacher preschool curriculum classes.  But Felix didn't want to stay in Providence so we moved to NJ. 
The first Valentine's Day that i lived in NJ my mother died.   I have never been able to replace the daycare job i left in Providence.  I miss how easy it was to get around Providence, how close it was to Boston, how we had our own NBC, ABC, and CBS affiliates.   These were thing i took for granted. The part of Providence where i taught was the last Italian  neighborhood there.  NJ has none of this .
 i have never adjusted to living in NJ and we've been here 22 years.

Since we've lived in NJ we've had four dogs, all Siberian Huskies.   The Valentine's Day Gianna was 9 Felix bought her a husky pup that we named BJ.  Having forgotten how crazy Husky pups are, i screamed, ranted and cursed at  BJ.  But that puppy had heart soul AND looks.  He saw us thru tons of Gianna drama and was always there with a wag of his tail.  We had millions of crazy BJ stories he ran to South Plainfield, Edison and all over Metuchen.   Last Christmas we had to say goodbye to BJ.  There'll never be another dog like him.
Now don't get me wrong life is good, 
BUT,
  i've got to remember, every day is a gift from GOD so i've got to give every day my best shot and appreciate what i have right now 
BECAUSE
it can be taken from me in an instant
AND
we don't know way we've got till it's gone.